I sat down and read some of my journal entries over the last couple of years and decided to take a little time for some reflection. The idea of "contentment" is something that regularly comes up on the pages that I've written over time. The ironic thing is, I still haven't done some of the things that I wanted to have accomplished at this point in my life, but I'm really quite content. It was a long road getting here though.
Quick recap: A little over a year ago I made the decision to move to South Carolina. No, it wasn't because I had gone to school here. My family didn't pick up and move here. And it definitely wasn't because of work. I came by myself, sight unseen, with no job lined up. I think that there were probably a lot of people that thought I was crazy or stupid, but people that know me know that that's how I roll these days.
The first 6 months in SC where undoubtedly the hardest months of my life up this point. I began the job search immediately and came up empty handed time after time. I started to question my move but I'm not one to narrow God's will. I believe that I can be in a number of places and still be within the general will of God and He can use me wherever I am. So I continued on and kept hope that something was going to come up.
During that time I learned a lot about myself, my God and my relationship with Him. My faith was tested beyond what I thought that I could endure and I learned that faith really isn't faith until it's all your holding onto. And God's grace really is sufficient and He doesn't give us more than we can handle.
Don't get me wrong, I got frustrated with God... very frustrated at times. And I did my fair share of questioning Him. I was reminded time and time again that life's not fair and He never said that it would be. But through it all, I was able to see God's work. Maybe not at the time, but eventually.
I learned a lot, but as I read things I've written and remember lessons that my Father has taught me along the road of life, I can't help but wonder, did I really learn? I still struggle with some of things that I thought I'd overcome. I wonder how strong my faith really is at times and I still get frustrated with God. But He remains the same and when I'm done trying to do on my own, He's there to pick up the pieces and help me to change.
The last couple of years have been difficult for much of the time, but I've learned so much and I wouldn't trade the years or months for anything.
Quick recap: A little over a year ago I made the decision to move to South Carolina. No, it wasn't because I had gone to school here. My family didn't pick up and move here. And it definitely wasn't because of work. I came by myself, sight unseen, with no job lined up. I think that there were probably a lot of people that thought I was crazy or stupid, but people that know me know that that's how I roll these days.
The first 6 months in SC where undoubtedly the hardest months of my life up this point. I began the job search immediately and came up empty handed time after time. I started to question my move but I'm not one to narrow God's will. I believe that I can be in a number of places and still be within the general will of God and He can use me wherever I am. So I continued on and kept hope that something was going to come up.
During that time I learned a lot about myself, my God and my relationship with Him. My faith was tested beyond what I thought that I could endure and I learned that faith really isn't faith until it's all your holding onto. And God's grace really is sufficient and He doesn't give us more than we can handle.
Don't get me wrong, I got frustrated with God... very frustrated at times. And I did my fair share of questioning Him. I was reminded time and time again that life's not fair and He never said that it would be. But through it all, I was able to see God's work. Maybe not at the time, but eventually.
I learned a lot, but as I read things I've written and remember lessons that my Father has taught me along the road of life, I can't help but wonder, did I really learn? I still struggle with some of things that I thought I'd overcome. I wonder how strong my faith really is at times and I still get frustrated with God. But He remains the same and when I'm done trying to do on my own, He's there to pick up the pieces and help me to change.
The last couple of years have been difficult for much of the time, but I've learned so much and I wouldn't trade the years or months for anything.
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