What Captures My Heart....

Today, Daniel (my 2 year-old cousin) smiled at me when I walked into the room and said "I remember you". And I melted. He went down for a nap and when he woke up, I had gone. He called me and asked me where I was and why did I leave. Love it! Kids are always so honest and state whatever is in their heads. Sometimes, you feel about knee high after being around them and other times, they make you feel extra special. That was how I felt today. 

Before I left South Carolina, Emma, who's 3, gave me lots of hugs, told me she'd miss me and even asked me if she could go with me. She and I are somewhat kindred spirits and I will miss her. :)

They say that home is where your heart is, but I think it's also where you feel loved. It's where you are appreciated, cherished and wanted. Sometimes one's heart can be in more places than just one. And when kids steal your heart, as they have a way of doing, part of you will always feel at home wherever they may be. 

Beyond Blessed

I left work yesterday feeling truly overwhelmed and very loved. At times, the two little words of "Thank You" don't seem like they are enough. I had the chance to work with some really wonderful people and I had some great customers. All will be missed, probably more than they know. And from the very bottom of my heart, THANK YOU!

Memories, Changes and Thanks

Tomorrow morning I will get in my car, drive to Homeland Park and go to work just like I have for the last two years. However, at the end of the day I will count down my drawer, hand in my keys and walk out the door for the last time. Tomorrow will be my last day at the bank. It's hard to believe I've been there for over two years now. Quick recap, I moved to South Carolina in August 2007 on a bit of a whim and a need for adventure. I thought that finding a job was going to be easy but that wasn't the case at all. I had no job at all for about a month and a half and then part-time employment until March 2008. When I started at the bank I was never so glad to see a Monday - Friday, 8-5 job. 

Tomorrow, and this weekend, will be a time of mixed emotions. I'm excited about change and moving on. But there's a piece of my heart here and I'll be leaving that behind. I think that, unless you are truly a heartless person, you can't spend any significant amount of time anywhere without developing some sort of attachment. 

If I were to start a list of personal "Thank Yous" here, it would take up quite a bit of time and space. And anyone who knows me well knows that I'm not really one for "Good-Byes". So this isn't going to be a long, drawn-out message. But allow me to say this:

There have been many people that have had an impact on my life during the last two and half years. Some more than others, but all have been important. If you're reading this, you most likely are in that group. It's amazing how the heart expands and makes room for all the people in our lives. And my heart has certainly grown bigger. I have appreciated the southern hospitality, all of the "Yank" jokes I've endured, your patience, kindness, support and love. Please know that you all will be remembered and loved forever.

I'm really not a "Good-Bye" person but more of a "See You Later" kind of girl. Things may be changing right now, but change can be good and life will most likely bring us together again in the future. 

Thanks for the memories and here's to all the new ones yet to come. :)

Glimpses of Eternity

I've probably mentioned this before, but I love CBS Sunday Morning. They usually have great stories and interesting features. This morning the focus was on outer space. Is there life out there? How many planets and galaxies are there that we know nothing about? And as they were discussing all of this and showing some amazing pictures that have been taken, one scientist made a comment that struck me. He said "no imagination could have come up with this". I thought about that for a minute and then thought, "But an imagination did come up with it and then spoke it into existence". And then I got thinking about God's imagination. We humans have been given great minds - some more than others. Think about all the things that we've thought about and come up with and dreamed up over the centuries. Some things are out of needs, others of wants and some are just plain crazy but nevertheless, we've used our imagination. Now, if we are created in the image of God, then doesn't it make sense that God also has an imagination?! And since everything about God is on a much grander scale, then how big must His imagination be! Looking at space is such a great and amazing thing and reminds me of how big my God is. But it also shows how creative He is. He thought up the earth and all that surrounds it and there may be far more out there that we as humans know nothing about. And I don't mean aliens. But there my be planets and galaxies that we haven't seen yet. And the great part is we have an eternity to explore and discover. 

I have thoughts and ideas of what I think eternity might be like. I could be way off, but what if we're able to just think about a place and be there. And what will a new heaven and a new earth be like? Honestly, the thought of living forever and ever is really mind blowing and almost scary but I'm pretty confident that we won't be bored. Because think about this, God existed before the beginning and He's going to be there throughout eternity. Now, since He was before the beginning that we know, and since I think that He has a pretty amazing imagination, I don't believe that He was bored or uncreative before the world began and I don't think He's going to send us into a boring eternity. I know some people that believe that we're just going to worship God before His throne for ever and ever because we'll just be so thankful for all He did for us. Don't get me wrong, I am in no way down playing Christ's sacrifice for us on the cross. It was and always will be the best and most amazing demonstration of Love ever. And I think that when we get to Heaven there will be plenty of praising and worshiping and honoring. But I also am one to believe that there will be other things to do. God made us all special and unique. We are different from the angels and I believe we always will be. We are creative. We are adventurous. We are curious. And although I think that once we get to Heaven a lot of our questions from earth will be answered, maybe we'll have new questions. Doesn't it make sense that there will be new things to discover if there's a new Heaven and a new Earth? And what fun would it be if we just knew everything and sat around? If you know me, you know that I love to travel and plan to do a lot of it if I can. I also plan to travel after my time on this earth ends and I think it will be much easier since things like money and security won't be an issue. I hope to see new and amazing things and get a better idea of just how great God's imagination truly is.

You may not agree with me and that's fine. I might have lost you somewhere in the reading of this and that's okay too. But just think for a moment about how great God really is and if you find yourself forgetting, take some time to look at pictures from outer space or just looking up at a clear, night sky and try to count the stars.

The Stuff Dreams are Made Of

Today I sat on the living room floor and sorted through drawers of stuff that I've collected over the years. I feel like I've been cleaning for weeks and I'm not done yet. It's amazing all the junk that we can accumulate over time. And I'm just one person in a little apartment who still has boxes in storage in her parents attic. I hate think about packing up a whole house and family. That's probably one of the reasons I don't have those things yet. Maybe someday. My mother made the comment to me that perhaps a time will come when I will settle in one place and have a house and not have to move this stuff around (is she hinting about the boxes in the attic??). :) As I made piles of things - save, sell, throw - I thought about the meaning of the things I have. Some of it might look like junk to any other person, but it has some meaning or sentimental value to me. And so, it goes where I go. But the things that matter the most to me aren't things that can be packed in boxes and placed in storage. In fact, they aren't things at all. 

Two and a half years ago, I set out on a journey. I didn't know what would happen, but I knew that I needed change and to find some things on my own. I moved, sight unseen, to a town and an area where, at the time, I knew only five people. I had no job, no car and no idea what was going to happen. And truth be told, the first few months were the hardest months of my life. Nothing really turned out like I planned, but I learned a lot through it all. I learned more about myself, my God, my relationship with my Heavenly Father and my family. I have an amazing family. I know I've said that before, but it's true. My parents have loved and supported me through all my wandering and random ideas and chasing of dreams. My siblings and I always pick up right where we left off and we have so much fun together. I have the best aunts and uncles and cousins that anyone could ask for. And my grandmother is amazing. Every time I go home she reminds me that she prays for us all and I know she does. And heaven knows we need it.

I think that it took this move for me to truly appreciate my family for who they are and all that they do. I'm not the type to really ever get homesick, but there have been times over the last two years that being so far away was more than difficult. Over time, things change. People get older. Families expand. Kids grow up. And I realize these things are inevitable and happen no matter where we are, but I came to a point of realizing that what I'd left behind was more important to me than I had originally thought. 

I'm still me. I'm still adventurous, still random and definitely still chasing dreams. I hope that I always do. I still have plans to travel the world and I still have several different jobs I think I want to do and lots of things to learn and discover. The thought of settling down still makes me claustrophobic and I will forever love the call of the open road. It's time for a new adventure, a little bit closer to home. Two weeks from now I'll be in a different state, setting out on a new journey. And as always, I'm really excited. I love change. But as I pack up my stuff and look to the horizon, the most important things I take are the memories of the past and hopes for the future. Because those are the things that make up my dreams.