The Stuff Dreams are Made Of

Today I sat on the living room floor and sorted through drawers of stuff that I've collected over the years. I feel like I've been cleaning for weeks and I'm not done yet. It's amazing all the junk that we can accumulate over time. And I'm just one person in a little apartment who still has boxes in storage in her parents attic. I hate think about packing up a whole house and family. That's probably one of the reasons I don't have those things yet. Maybe someday. My mother made the comment to me that perhaps a time will come when I will settle in one place and have a house and not have to move this stuff around (is she hinting about the boxes in the attic??). :) As I made piles of things - save, sell, throw - I thought about the meaning of the things I have. Some of it might look like junk to any other person, but it has some meaning or sentimental value to me. And so, it goes where I go. But the things that matter the most to me aren't things that can be packed in boxes and placed in storage. In fact, they aren't things at all. 

Two and a half years ago, I set out on a journey. I didn't know what would happen, but I knew that I needed change and to find some things on my own. I moved, sight unseen, to a town and an area where, at the time, I knew only five people. I had no job, no car and no idea what was going to happen. And truth be told, the first few months were the hardest months of my life. Nothing really turned out like I planned, but I learned a lot through it all. I learned more about myself, my God, my relationship with my Heavenly Father and my family. I have an amazing family. I know I've said that before, but it's true. My parents have loved and supported me through all my wandering and random ideas and chasing of dreams. My siblings and I always pick up right where we left off and we have so much fun together. I have the best aunts and uncles and cousins that anyone could ask for. And my grandmother is amazing. Every time I go home she reminds me that she prays for us all and I know she does. And heaven knows we need it.

I think that it took this move for me to truly appreciate my family for who they are and all that they do. I'm not the type to really ever get homesick, but there have been times over the last two years that being so far away was more than difficult. Over time, things change. People get older. Families expand. Kids grow up. And I realize these things are inevitable and happen no matter where we are, but I came to a point of realizing that what I'd left behind was more important to me than I had originally thought. 

I'm still me. I'm still adventurous, still random and definitely still chasing dreams. I hope that I always do. I still have plans to travel the world and I still have several different jobs I think I want to do and lots of things to learn and discover. The thought of settling down still makes me claustrophobic and I will forever love the call of the open road. It's time for a new adventure, a little bit closer to home. Two weeks from now I'll be in a different state, setting out on a new journey. And as always, I'm really excited. I love change. But as I pack up my stuff and look to the horizon, the most important things I take are the memories of the past and hopes for the future. Because those are the things that make up my dreams.